her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
