what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Boobs are out for the taking
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Randomize
