What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.