garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
