I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
