Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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