did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
