How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
