Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Michael Bay diarrhea
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Randomize
