Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
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