im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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