This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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