my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize