so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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