aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize