I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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