tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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