Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
