Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I wish I only lived at night.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life