Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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