so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
and she was petting her beer can
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
