I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
