yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
