I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
