Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man