dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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