i'm signing you up for texting rehab
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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