champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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