normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Randomize
