I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize