Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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