just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize