I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
