When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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