apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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