Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
How does one acquire holy water?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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