Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
