so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
