so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
