i permit you to call me
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
