Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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