Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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