Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
