I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Randomize