Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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