we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
