I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
