No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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