i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
