We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
