Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Did I show you my penis last night?
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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